Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Middle school drama isn't confined to middle school

I am afraid of the other preschool mommies.

When I drop off/pick up Little Prince, they're always clumped together, chatting and laughing and looking utterly carefee urban-chic. I've never seen Desperate Housewives, but I'd imagine these ladies would be the Brazilian version. They wear HEELS, people. Like, on a daily basis. Pointy-toed ones. With tailored pants that just scream "dry-clean only." I think I own ONE dry-clean only dress. And I refuse to confess to the cyber-world when the last time I actually had it cleaned. Or wore it, for that matter.

They lean against their shiny SUVs and gossip about their manicurists and how "it's been weeks since I've had my highlights retouched, dahling." My slightly orangey-brown-y Zafira (closest thing here to a mini-van) is actually silver, but no one would ever guess that. And when I'm REALLY making an effort to look nice, I run a brush through my hair before I get in the car. And maybe take a washcloth to the spit-up stains on my shirt.

There's actually one mommy there who doesn't do the tailored-pants-and-matching-accessories-thing. No, no. She wears exercise clothes. Like, real ones. Not just the bleach-splashed-sweat-pants-and-BYU-alumni-shirt that I got goin' on. She gots the spandex leggings in every color with coordinating top. And several pairs of running shoes. And the shoelaces aren't even dirty.

I don't know how she does it, but she totally pulls it off. The woman doesn't have single ripple or ridge on her body. Believe me, I know. Leotards communicate. Let's just say that when I'm around her, I feel extremely lumpy.

What kills me is she's dressed to sweat EVERY TIME I SEE HER - although never actually sweating. When I drop off. When I pick up. At parent meetings. It's incredible. Either this woman exercises 24/7 or she owns a gym. I wouldn't know, since I'm too embarrassed to actually talk to her.

I am closer to 30 than 20. I have a husband. Three kids. I'm pretty darn established. But when I'm around these women, all of a sudden I'm 12 years old again, the gangly geeky kid blending into the wall reading a book. And they are the sophisticated 'popular ones,' breezing through life with nary a care.

[Okay, okay. I'm mature enough to not be jealous. I'm not. Really. I don't want to be them at all. I'm perfectly content with my life, although not my body. Be that as it may, I'll still never work up the guts to have a conversation with them.]


Rocketgirl said...

Gah, I know wat you mean. I am so happy with where I am in life, but then I see women who look like that think "How the HECK do they even do that?!"

johnny said...

"Leotards communicate." - Ne'er a truer word spoken. Errr...written. I'm so glad you found me so I could find you...in BRAZIL no less!!!

Elizabeth said...

Oh hon, they're just weird. Come back to the US where people are... um... different weird. Like in Utah. Utah is special weird. But you'll like it! Come live on my block. There are SO many houses for sale in the Provo/Orem area, find one close to me!! We'll be slightly chubby mom-chic together and not care a bit about the (mostly non-existent in these parts) trendier moms out there!

Mommadj5 said...

Everyone puts their pants on one leg at a time - they probably envy YOU for being able to be "carefree"! What's up with the "new look" blog? Remember who you are always and don't feel inferior to ANYBODY!!!!

kristi said...

You make me laugh!!!! With me, I get embarrassed when I open my van door next to another parent because there is always so much junk on the floor. I am sure you look just beautiful when you pick up your little prince.

Lisa Fox said...

You know i just commented to someone that Heavenly Father must have known i wasn't feeling super hot about my self lately, because EVERYWHERE i go someone is telling me what an amazing person i am. Now i know not all these people truely believe it BUT it still makes me feel a little bit better. I bet these women are wondering how in the world does she have 3 wonderful little boys and stay home with them and be so happy....:) " all the time"

Rachel H said...

I agree with the above comments, but let me just say that we lived 3 miles from Mexico in texas for 2 years, and we had more Mexicans than Americans around us, and maybe I am being way generalizing to say this- but SERIOUSLY, they would wear heels to WALMART. I would see these cute Mexican Divas getting dressed up for WALMART, in a town so small there was hardly even a mall there.

While I lived there, I would wear sweats every single day and stopped wearing makeup because I had NO where to go. Getting dressed up for walmart actaully made me MORE depressed (because I had no where to go!). But Kudos to them for beind dedicated to utter cuteness all the time. (I guess?)